what have you learned about gender roles throughout your childhood & adulthood?
it's surprising the amount of influence our families have on us in how we view not only our own gender, but how we interact with the opposite gender. we often hear of freudian implications but i don't think freud was so far off the mark. the people who raised you (in most cases, the parents, but in some cases another adult or group of adults) really do influence how you perceive & interact with others.
most happy, well-adjusted kids are taught the basics of a healthy relationship by watching their parents. if mom & dad love one another & show that to each other, as well as demonstrate this to their offspring, most children grow up modeling that in reacting to the opposite sex. same with the parents' relationships with those of their gender. if mom had healthy relationships with other women, it modeled to her daughter that women are (in general) able to have healthy relationships. if dad had good male-bonding relationships, it demonstrated that men can be trusted.
by the same token, people demonstrating unhealthy relationships can knowingly or unknowingly damage their children's development. fighting parents model a behavior that indicates that the number one person in a relationship is oneself rather than one's partner.
last night in our home group we discussed gender roles -- how we perceive them from our families; what the bible says about them; & how society has molded the idea of traditional roles. listening to the stories of how people were raised literally baffled me. we had a pretty even split of people raised by divorced parents & people raised by parents who are still together. the stories of role models being TV characters or absent are fascinating. think about how different you could be today if you based your idea of love on mike brady or ricky ricardo or the neighborhood pervert. imagine the difference of modeling that which you've known, & assume others have known, only to find out that this is deviant behavior from "the norm".
imagine!
it's no wonder our society has begun to eschew the idea of community & true dependence on one another. we can't even depend on those in our own families to model true community.
if anything, it made me thankful to realize that my parents put so much care & love into raising me, into teaching me right & wrong, into teaching me how to think & analyze, into developing me & not a facsimile of some other character. i'm thankful beyond words for that.
it's surprising the amount of influence our families have on us in how we view not only our own gender, but how we interact with the opposite gender. we often hear of freudian implications but i don't think freud was so far off the mark. the people who raised you (in most cases, the parents, but in some cases another adult or group of adults) really do influence how you perceive & interact with others.
most happy, well-adjusted kids are taught the basics of a healthy relationship by watching their parents. if mom & dad love one another & show that to each other, as well as demonstrate this to their offspring, most children grow up modeling that in reacting to the opposite sex. same with the parents' relationships with those of their gender. if mom had healthy relationships with other women, it modeled to her daughter that women are (in general) able to have healthy relationships. if dad had good male-bonding relationships, it demonstrated that men can be trusted.
by the same token, people demonstrating unhealthy relationships can knowingly or unknowingly damage their children's development. fighting parents model a behavior that indicates that the number one person in a relationship is oneself rather than one's partner.
last night in our home group we discussed gender roles -- how we perceive them from our families; what the bible says about them; & how society has molded the idea of traditional roles. listening to the stories of how people were raised literally baffled me. we had a pretty even split of people raised by divorced parents & people raised by parents who are still together. the stories of role models being TV characters or absent are fascinating. think about how different you could be today if you based your idea of love on mike brady or ricky ricardo or the neighborhood pervert. imagine the difference of modeling that which you've known, & assume others have known, only to find out that this is deviant behavior from "the norm".
imagine!
it's no wonder our society has begun to eschew the idea of community & true dependence on one another. we can't even depend on those in our own families to model true community.
if anything, it made me thankful to realize that my parents put so much care & love into raising me, into teaching me right & wrong, into teaching me how to think & analyze, into developing me & not a facsimile of some other character. i'm thankful beyond words for that.
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on 11 November 2005 at 11/11/2005 12:14:00 PM.
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